You mean Captain Bentley?267
That I am. Why?185
I'm SURE I don't know what you mean!182
Well do it.179
Now listen here bucko, my course was true, like all of my others, and if you have a problem with how I do my job, then you'd better go and speak to the Captain about it, because I don't appreciate a stowaway177
You'd better do that then.175
Oh, I'm sooooo scared now.174
But you're still here.172
Well you better go then.172
wandering in here and criticising me!141
I do not have to take this kind of abuse from a common stowaway!138
Really? You don't seem like the type he would make friends with.137
No you didn't. You called him Captain Renney.137
Yet I have known him for over 20 years and he has never asked to be referred to as anything except Captain Bentley.136
And indeed, he has never mentioned any stowaway looking vagabonds as friends.136
But it wasn't my fault!134
Oh, I'm sure your good friend Captain Bentley has told you all about the last jinx we had on board.130
Magic. It must be magic. Somebody must have jinxed our ship, but I have no idea who would have done that or why.129
Oh, it was horrible. I never knew the human body could contain so many mackerel.129
My calculations and plotted course were expertly calculated, and there can be only one reason why the ship has failed to arrive at its expected destination.123
Look, see for yourself! All co-ordinates for the journey are carefully plotted to all visible waypoints and landmasses!107
There can only be one POSSIBLE explanation why the ship hasn't reached its destination, as I mentioned before!106
Although your highly suspicious behaviour towards me, and mysterious sudden appearance on board at the *exact time* that this jinx appears to have been brought upon us would seem to make you the obvious candidate.106
And then that thing they did with the tinderbox and the cheese... I still wake up with nightmares about that sometimes...103
And we all know what we do to someone who is a jinx.99
Frankly sirrah your rudeness is quite appalling!97
Frankly madam your rudeness is quite appalling!43
Well there's a good remedy for that.13
My pleasure.10
I know. So was I.10
Me? I'm the navigator. My job is to ensure the ship travels where it's supposed to go once it's moving by constantly checking our8
As I say, being a navigator is a real skill - you really have to think on your feet!8
What do you want, spoken to the captain yet?8
Oh, what is it now?7
Oh, just relaxing while I wait for the ship to cast off.7
No, I don't think so.6
This seems once again an effort on your behalf to throw the trail away from your own jinxed self bringing us misfortune.6
I am the very model of self-restraint. As you should have realised by now, as I haven't yet given the order to have you put to death. Yet.6
Yes. I suggest you check elsewhere.6
Yes, and I certainly have my eye on you.6
bearings against our plotted course, using charts and a sextant.6
Why, when you think of just how much sea there is out there, ANYTHING could happen if there wasn't a competent navigator on board ensuring that we reach our destination safely and in the shortest possible time!6
Yesiree, once we get sailing, it's all up to me to make sure we don't run into trouble or go off course!6
never even known it!5
And then where would they be?5
When we're sailing I'll be very busy you know! I'm probably the single most important person on board when we're sailing!5
People often think that we just sail off when we feel like it, but its actually far more complicated than that!5
You could almost say that I'm the linchpin of the entire operation! Why, if it wasn't for me, the rest of the guys might be sailing for, oooh, hours, and be slightly off course and5
None at all.4
Best you get a move on then. My reputation as a navigator is at stake!4
Oh no, not you again!4
How is that an admission of guilt???4
What's to deny??? You haven't asked me anything!4
(sigh) Please... Please just ask me your questions then leave me alone...4
Er... at the feast?4
Um... yes, how could I not have been at the feast the whole time that I was at the feast?4
They might even be a few hours late for their destination! Or a few miles down the road from it!4
What? I'm not a jinx, we've already had this discussion!4
That approach works, does it?4
I think a more subtle approach might yield you better results.4
Look, I've had just about enough of you!3
I'm not even going to dignify that with a response, you have come in here with a string of falsehoods against me, and apparently have some vendetta against me for some reason unknown to me, when I think it's pretty3
clear that if anybody is a jinx on this ship it is you!3
Confess to WHAT exactly??? I have done nothing wrong!3
I went to a feast on Lunar Isle, I stayed with the rest of the crew the whole night, I didn't see anyone offending them, and I didn't do anything to offend them myself!3
That kind of order can only come from the Captain, I'm afraid. Go speak with him.3
Yep, as the rest of the crew basically stand around not doing much, I'll be the one in the cabin, comparing wind speeds, landmarks and charts with my sextant, making sure that we get to the destination on time, and on3
That's your way of apologising for falsely accusing me of all that stuff earlier is it?2
Why, you insufferable...2
Wait, you mean you're saying you think the First Mate has done this???2
No. No way. You're even more off base with your crazy assumptions than ever.2
Oh, what now???1